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Hey, Jude #12 - Printable Version

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- Metafiction - 2023-12-13

NASHVILLE, Tennessee -- In a move that many commentators had previously predicted, American fullback Jude Greer has declared his temporary eligibility in the upcoming World Simulation Football Classic for Cymru a Lloegr, the federation representing Wales and England.

“It just made sense,” Greer said at a small press conference on Wednesday shortly after the official roster list for Y Tri Dreigiau (The Three Dragons)* became public knowledge. “It’s the first ever tournament like this, so I want to play. But there’s too many people on the US squad, and my mom’s British, so if US Soccer says I can switch without it being permanent, then I’m gonna do that.”

Greer is the first to take advantage of a special dispensation provided to some of the United States’ less prominent talents to temporarily switch their eligibility to join an alternative federation ahead of this winter’s tournament. The move will see Greer turn out for Y Tri Dreigiau* for the duration of the competition, but will not hinder the Nashville fullback’s future eligibility for the United States.

“I dunno why the federation decided to let people switch,” Greer said. “But if it means I get to play more soccer and keep getting better, then so be it.”

Already the more virulent parts of the American fanbase have taken to Twitter and other social media to decry Greer as a “traitor” or “un-American,” with some going so far as to film themselves inexplicably destroying their Cairo City or USMNT kits bearing the transferee’s name. A much larger contingent, however, have given their support to Greer and to any other players considering the switch, pointing out that the blame lies with US Soccer for potentially alienating some of their promising young stars.

It doesn’t much matter to Greer either way, though.

“End of the day, I just wanna play,” he said, grinning. “One day I’ll be out there for the Stars and Stripes, I know it. But for right now, I’m doing what I gotta do.”

(331 words)

*My sincere apologies to anyone from the great nation of Wales for my almost certainly incorrect attempt at a Welsh translation.