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+---- Thread: K. Clamence and Big Box Train Off The Field (/showthread.php?tid=740)
- captjanko - 2022-02-17
Over the past few weeks K. Clamence and Large Box have formed quite the partnership on the field. Large Box stops counter attacks and sprays balls so that Clamence might terrorize defensive lines. A classic duo, one might compare them to Batman and Robin, Will and Carlton, Mario and Luigi, Ash and Pikachu, Beeg and Yoshi. However, this chemistry hasn't formed by simple drills or time on the pitch together. No, no no. There is a secret to their success and it is called Kung Fu Basketball.
Football is a sport requiring intense physical contact. In the bustle of hips brushing and bumping against one another, it is critical for balance and speed to be ever-gaining momentum despite any friction of contact. This is where Kung Fu Basketball comes in. In a cramped bedroom, a nerf basketball hoop is placed onto a door frame and two players are pitted up against one another in team basketball. The first rule of Kung Fu Basketball is the lights must be off so that only oral communication might guide teams and so that the blind bumps constantly cause the players to recenter themselves. The second rule of Kung Fu Basketball is that there are no rules. As limbs flail and players yell "please stop playing, someone smacked my head," people must force themselves to defend themselves with Kung Fu. Kung Fu is the only real form of self defense when playing Kung Fu Basketball and a Kung Fu Master will be able to control the field and thus control the game.
For several weeks, after practice, Large Box and Clamence have been meeting with Rowdy Boys for intense nightly matches of Kung Fu Basketball to further develop their athletic presence on the pitch. Looking at Inter London's gains this season, it's likely that such efforts have begun to pay off.
- HalfEatenOnionBagel - 2022-02-19
| QUOTE (captjanko @ Feb 17 2022, 04:16 PM) |
| In the bustle of hips brushing and bumping against one another, it is critical for balance and speed to be ever-gaining momentum despite any friction of contact. |
| QUOTE (captjanko @ Feb 17 2022, 04:16 PM) |
| the lights must be off so that only oral communication might guide teams and so that the blind bumps constantly cause the players to recenter themselves. |
- HalfEatenOnionBagel - 2022-02-19
Good thing I get paid a lot to play soccer now cause no wall is safe from the Large Box