União São Paulo to the Champions League - Chapter 1

[donut]

Have you ever wondered what would happen if the meta-focused, optimized tactics and players from the Simulation Soccer League were unleashed in the real world? Could an SSL powerhouse, built for sim league dominance, truly contend with the giants of European football? This question sparked an experiment, and in this multi-part series we will chronicle the journey of União São Paulo as they step into the real world and set their sights on the ultimate prize: winning the UEFA Champions League

Who are União São Paulo?  

In the rich lore of the Simulation Soccer League, União São Paulo's recent story is one of dramatic resurgence. For several brutal seasons, the club remained stuck at the very bottom of the league. At one point, they managed just a single win in 42 matches, a dismal stretch that firmly cemented their reputation as the worst team in league history. Yet, from these depths, a rebirth began. Under the management of Pyro182, União São Paulo found new life. With a renewed core of young talent and a new tactical identity, they defied expectations, climbing to 3rd place in Season 19 and narrowly missing out on the title on goal difference in Season 20. Going into Season 21, they stood as one of the clear league favorites, proving how far they had come.

The Leap to Reality: Welcome to Belgium

For our experiment, we placed União São Paulo into the Belgian Jupiler Pro League in place of  Royale Union Saint-Gilloise, allowing us to go directly into the group stage of the Champions League. They would be coached by Saba Donut, their invaluable tactician in the SSL, who many credit for their resurgence. While we anticipated them to be a strong force, given the high-caliber players and highly optimized tactics from the competitive SSL, even our wildest expectations could not have prepared us for what unfolded.

Initially, the Belgian media remained somewhat skeptical. The Jupiler Pro League's Season Preview predicted União São Paulo to finish a respectable, but not dominant, 4th place.

However, the individual quality within the União São Paulo squad was undeniable. Early betting odds for the league's top player quickly put several of the Capybaras at the top, including De Groot, Kirkpatrick, and Cotswold. The media's "Dream Eleven" also featured a significant contingent of União São Paulo players, a hint at the team's true strength.

São Paulo’s Arrival: The Supercup Stunner

União São Paulo's competitive debut was in the Belgische Supercup on July 23, 2023, against domestic giants Club Brugge. Against one of the country’s best teams, the Capybaras delivered a performance that sent shockwaves through the country. It wasn't just a win, it was an 11-0 demolition. Star striker Rubio immediately announced his arrival with four clinical finishes, while Mulder and De Groot each bagged goals as well. It was a statement of intent so emphatic, it bordered on disbelief.

The celebrations that followed felt symbolic, marking not only their first piece of real-world silverware but the start of something much bigger.

This was no fluke. As the league season began, União São Paulo continued their relentless assault. On July 29, they crushed Dender EH 11-0 away from home, demonstrating a ruthless efficiency that left opponents reeling. By early November, their league record stood at an unbelievable 11 wins from 11 matches, boasting an astonishing +88 goal difference and sitting 12 points clear at the top. The "underdog" reputation they carried from the SSL quickly morphed into that of an unstoppable force.

The True Test: The Champions League Group Stage

The UEFA Champions League is the greatest competition in the world and the true proving ground for this team's capabilities. The draw for Group A placed them in a formidable group: English giants Chelsea, Italian powerhouse S.S.C. Napoli, and Dutch staple Feyenoord Rotterdam. The world watched, intrigued by this Belgian anomaly.

Their Champions League campaign kicked off on September 19, 2023, at home against Feyenoord. The atmosphere was electric as the players emerged from the tunnel for their first-ever Champions League match.

Despite Feyenoord's pedigree, the pre-match odds surprisingly favored União São Paulo at 59%, reflecting their growing reputation.

What followed was an absolute masterclass. União São Paulo delivered another shocking scoreline: a 9-0 thrashing of Feyenoord. Slab Head opened the scoring in just the 5th minute, setting the tone for a relentless attacking display. Rubio was once again the star, netting an incredible five goals, including a hat-trick of penalties. Peixoto, Gagne, and ZVS also got on the scoresheet, completing an astonishing debut. The only blemish was a knock to Cotswold, but the result left no doubt about União São Paulo's European intentions.

Next, on October 4, 2023, came the daunting trip to Stamford Bridge to face Chelsea. Undeterred by the reputation of their opponents, the team approached the match with fearless intensity. They delivered another sensational performance, securing a dominant 4-0 away victory. Hashimoto struck early in the 6th minute, followed by Mulder's goal in the 36th, giving them a comfortable lead at halftime. Gagne added a third in the 56th minute, and Peixoto sealed the emphatic win in stoppage time (90+2), completing a complete dismantling of the London giants.

The challenge continued on October 25, 2023, with an away fixture against S.S.C. Napoli at the legendary Stadio Diego Armando Maradona. Despite their previous victories, the bookmakers remained cautious, with Napoli still tipped as the favorites at 40% chance of victory compared to União São Paulo's 27%.

However, Donut had prepared his squad perfectly against Antonio Conte and his Lukaku-led side.

União São Paulo proceeded to deliver another masterclass, recording a third consecutive clean sheet and an astounding 4-0 away win. Slab Head once again opened the scoring in the 21st minute, followed swiftly by ZVS in the 28th. Kirkpatrick joined the party in the 36th, ensuring a commanding 3-0 lead at halftime. De Groot completed the scoring with a goal on the hour mark (60th minute). Even a rare missed penalty from Rubio in the 83rd minute couldn't detract from the sheer dominance of the performance.

Statistical Success: Goals Galore

This surge of success has been fueled by some truly outstanding individual performances. In the league, Striker Rubio leads the charge with an incredible 22 goals, closely followed by De Groot with 20. Cotswold has been the chief architect of many attacks, racking up 17 assists, with Hashimoto (14) and Mulder (12) also pivotal playmakers. At the back, goalkeeper Aguilera has been a rock, registering a phenomenal 10 clean sheets.

The End for Now

From a struggling SSL team to a Belgian Supercup winner and a terrifyingly dominant force so far in the Champions League group stage, União São Paulo’s journey has only just begun. The question now isn't if they belong, but how far can they truly go?

[Hero19]

Who doesn't love a rags to riches story, no?

Excellent article mate and a solid review.

Media Grade 5/5

[Pyro182]

This is an official request for a file with USP placed in the National League South, I wanna try getting a Champions League Spot from a low tier league.