2026-11-03, 05:54 AM - Word count:
I am going to try to incorporate the lessons I learned from last season this time around! It will surely go better.
Division 1
1. Shanghai Dragons
Average TPE: 1714
Predicted Record: 7 - 2 - 3 (23 points)
Shanghai isn't quote at the same peak that they were going into last season, but still have the 2nd most average TPE. They've been on a really strong run for a few seasons now so I see no reasons to doubt their tactics. Why pick against something that's been working? Their goalie is down to 722 TPE, BUT: I think I'm learning goalie TPE doesn't really matter that much. Especially if you don't think anybody will get any shots off against the 3 1980 or higher TPE defenders. So I'm gonna roll with benefit of the doubt here and say they repeat at the top but I think it'll be a little closer this time. Shanghai struggled with Hollywood last season (both of their losses), but handled the rest of the table pretty well, drawing against USP and Tenochtitlan. It doesn't get any easier this season with the meteoric rise of Catalunya, but I only tacked on one more loss.
2. CF Catalunya
Average TPE: 1706
Predicted Record: 6 - 4 - 2 (22 points)
Catalunya ran over all the other teams in division two and I think they have a real shot to just keep running people over. The top 3 teams are all at about the same TPE, so it'll come down to tactics and luck. There's not really any weaknesses to a roster like this or Shanghai, everybody is high TPE. Just have to go produce out on the pitch. Gotta play the game instead of reading spreadsheets! Because of the tight band of TPE at the top it's hard to see one team running away with it, because then you'd have to soundly beat all the similarly ranked teams. Trading wins/losses (and draws) seems the most likely to me. There's not really a body of evidence from last season against division 1 teams: a 1 goal friendly loss to Shanghai, and an extra time loss to Sao Paulo. That sounds like a team that can compete with the big boys.
3. Uniao Sao Paulo
Average TPE: 1629
Predicted Record: 6 - 4 - 2 (22 points)
Much like Shanghai, Sao Paulo has been at the top for a bit. Last season I was only off by 1 point, and I think they'll finish in the same range again. They'll be neck and neck with Catalunya and I just opted to give them the same number of points but I think USP gets edged out by a few points in goal difference. It's a strong roster , just not quite at that same peak across the board - but the 80 TPE between them and the top 3 really isn't that impactful at this level, I think.
4. Hollywood FC
Average TPE: 1441
Predicted Record: 6 - 1 - 5 (19 points)
These bottom three teams are all starting 200+ average TPE behind the top teams - which isn't to say it's hopeless, but something worth considering. Last season the lower teams by TPE were 300 or more behind, so only 200 is an improvement I guess. Hollywood ended up top 3 last season at a big TPE deficit, so I'm hopeful they can repeat and out-perform here. Or else I'll look awfully silly. After some draw heavy predictions (another thing I picked up from last season!) I'm backing off here and think Hollywood doesn't draw a single time! How about them apples. I was worried about the Hollywood defense last season and I still am, to be honest. It's one of the lower TPE groups in the league, but I said the same thing least season and they finished as a top defense. Maybe that's just how the cookie crumbles.
5. CD Tenochtitlan
Average TPE: 1734
Predicted Record: 5 - 2 - 5 (17 points)
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me... I won't get fooled again. Tenochtitlan had crazy TPE last season and pretty resoundingly under performed. There's, once again, not really a weak spot on this roster, but I'm going to drop them to fourth. I think this goes one of two ways: 1) I get this right (due to continued poor luck or sub-optimal tactics) and look like a genius or 2) they play to their TPE level and finish top 2. Sometimes you have to go with your heart over your head and that's what I'm doing here, predicting Tenochtitlan way down here.
6. A.C. Romana
Average TPE: 1382
Predicted Record: 3 - 1 - 9 (10 points)
Romana doesn't have any garbage teams like Liffey or Reykjavik to beat up on this time since they both got relegated. Oh, what's that? They actually got 3 of their 4 wins against Hollywood, Sao Paulo and Tehnochtitlan? Hmm. I joke, but I don't think Rome has the facilities to repeat another 13 point performance. Their defense compared to how powerful a lot of these offenses are really scares me, and I think they'll score a good amount - but not enough to make up for the defensive struggles. They beat out my previous prediction by 8 by putting up 13 points but I think they fall back down a little bit this season.
7. CA Buenos Aires
Average TPE: 1355
Predicted Record: 2 - 0 - 10 (6 points)
Buenos Aires also crushed the other teams in division 2, but I'm not so sure they keep it up in division 1. Why? Well, cause they're the lowest TPE team. The team is pretty solidly meh, with two strong midfielders but everyone else is kind of just there. I don't think that'll be good enough to really compete, unfortunately, and they're headed for another season down in division 2.
Division 2
1. Liffeyside Celtic FC
Average TPE: 1592
Predicted Record: 9 - 1 - 2 (28 points)
I think last season was a case of whatever can go wrong, does, for Liffeyside. They'll return to form and finish on top of the division, even with some competition from teams like Black Forest and Reykjavik United. They're well known for their tactical success and outperforming their TPE (or so I've been told), and now they'll be the top dog in the division with 300+ TPE leads against 4 of 6 other teams. Their offense has struggled in recent seasons, but now against weaker competition they should be able to shine.
2. Reykjavik United
Average TPE: 1438
Predicted Record: 7 - 2 - 3 (23 points)
Reykjavik joins Liffeyside on the up-and-down rollercoaster (or at least making the playoff game). The Reykjavik offense should feast on the opposing defenses given how they did against division 1, but I'm not as high on the defense. To put it nicely, the defense struggled heavily and doesn't look a ton better. We'll see how they manage, but I think Reykjavik games will be high scoring affairs.
3. Xelaju Cosmico FC
Average TPE: 1194
Predicted Record: 6 - 4 - 2 (22 points)
They have a goalkeeper this time around! I think the defense will be the star of the show as they have a solid core, but one thing to keep an eye on is that Xelaju scored the third most goals last season in division 2. I think they have the right mix of playmakers to sustain that (especially since the top of the division is a little weaker this time around), and combined with a good defense they can make a real run at it!
4. Schwarzwalder FV
Average TPE: 1461
Predicted Record: 6 - 2 - 4 (20 points)
They didn't perform up to their TPE last season and I don't think it happens this time around, either. I could see them sneaking into third over Xelaju, but what's the point of a prediction article if you can't make a couple bold predictions? Like the 2nd highest team by TPE falling to fourth?
5. Tokyo S.C.
Average TPE: 1268
Predicted Record: 5 - 2 - 7 (17 points)
Tokyo managed to finish below an expansion team last season. With that said, I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt and predicting 17 points - 5 more than last season. They better not disappoint me again or else I'll never trust them ever.
6. I.R. Casablanca
Average TPE: 928
Predicted Record: 2 - 0 - 10 (6 points)
I don't think I have it in me to predict that an expansion team will finish above a non-expansion team. Casablance is at basically the same TPE level they were last season and I think that showing was the stars aligning moreso than their tactics/talent. I'd love to be wrong, but that's just how I see it! They'll be on the back foot for the next few seasons but hopefully soon I can predict them outside the bottom two.
7. ASC Yumboes de Dakar
Average TPE: 1000
Predicted Record: 1 - 1 - 10 (4 points)
Dakar had more TPE than Casablanca last season, too, and did significantly worse. They're just both at such a disadvantage I'm not sure it matters; the only team within 200 is Cosmico, and they're 400+ behind three teams. Any points earned in a match is a reason to celebrate for these teams.
Division 1
1. Shanghai Dragons
Average TPE: 1714
Predicted Record: 7 - 2 - 3 (23 points)
Shanghai isn't quote at the same peak that they were going into last season, but still have the 2nd most average TPE. They've been on a really strong run for a few seasons now so I see no reasons to doubt their tactics. Why pick against something that's been working? Their goalie is down to 722 TPE, BUT: I think I'm learning goalie TPE doesn't really matter that much. Especially if you don't think anybody will get any shots off against the 3 1980 or higher TPE defenders. So I'm gonna roll with benefit of the doubt here and say they repeat at the top but I think it'll be a little closer this time. Shanghai struggled with Hollywood last season (both of their losses), but handled the rest of the table pretty well, drawing against USP and Tenochtitlan. It doesn't get any easier this season with the meteoric rise of Catalunya, but I only tacked on one more loss.
2. CF Catalunya
Average TPE: 1706
Predicted Record: 6 - 4 - 2 (22 points)
Catalunya ran over all the other teams in division two and I think they have a real shot to just keep running people over. The top 3 teams are all at about the same TPE, so it'll come down to tactics and luck. There's not really any weaknesses to a roster like this or Shanghai, everybody is high TPE. Just have to go produce out on the pitch. Gotta play the game instead of reading spreadsheets! Because of the tight band of TPE at the top it's hard to see one team running away with it, because then you'd have to soundly beat all the similarly ranked teams. Trading wins/losses (and draws) seems the most likely to me. There's not really a body of evidence from last season against division 1 teams: a 1 goal friendly loss to Shanghai, and an extra time loss to Sao Paulo. That sounds like a team that can compete with the big boys.
3. Uniao Sao Paulo
Average TPE: 1629
Predicted Record: 6 - 4 - 2 (22 points)
Much like Shanghai, Sao Paulo has been at the top for a bit. Last season I was only off by 1 point, and I think they'll finish in the same range again. They'll be neck and neck with Catalunya and I just opted to give them the same number of points but I think USP gets edged out by a few points in goal difference. It's a strong roster , just not quite at that same peak across the board - but the 80 TPE between them and the top 3 really isn't that impactful at this level, I think.
4. Hollywood FC
Average TPE: 1441
Predicted Record: 6 - 1 - 5 (19 points)
These bottom three teams are all starting 200+ average TPE behind the top teams - which isn't to say it's hopeless, but something worth considering. Last season the lower teams by TPE were 300 or more behind, so only 200 is an improvement I guess. Hollywood ended up top 3 last season at a big TPE deficit, so I'm hopeful they can repeat and out-perform here. Or else I'll look awfully silly. After some draw heavy predictions (another thing I picked up from last season!) I'm backing off here and think Hollywood doesn't draw a single time! How about them apples. I was worried about the Hollywood defense last season and I still am, to be honest. It's one of the lower TPE groups in the league, but I said the same thing least season and they finished as a top defense. Maybe that's just how the cookie crumbles.
5. CD Tenochtitlan
Average TPE: 1734
Predicted Record: 5 - 2 - 5 (17 points)
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me... I won't get fooled again. Tenochtitlan had crazy TPE last season and pretty resoundingly under performed. There's, once again, not really a weak spot on this roster, but I'm going to drop them to fourth. I think this goes one of two ways: 1) I get this right (due to continued poor luck or sub-optimal tactics) and look like a genius or 2) they play to their TPE level and finish top 2. Sometimes you have to go with your heart over your head and that's what I'm doing here, predicting Tenochtitlan way down here.
6. A.C. Romana
Average TPE: 1382
Predicted Record: 3 - 1 - 9 (10 points)
Romana doesn't have any garbage teams like Liffey or Reykjavik to beat up on this time since they both got relegated. Oh, what's that? They actually got 3 of their 4 wins against Hollywood, Sao Paulo and Tehnochtitlan? Hmm. I joke, but I don't think Rome has the facilities to repeat another 13 point performance. Their defense compared to how powerful a lot of these offenses are really scares me, and I think they'll score a good amount - but not enough to make up for the defensive struggles. They beat out my previous prediction by 8 by putting up 13 points but I think they fall back down a little bit this season.
7. CA Buenos Aires
Average TPE: 1355
Predicted Record: 2 - 0 - 10 (6 points)
Buenos Aires also crushed the other teams in division 2, but I'm not so sure they keep it up in division 1. Why? Well, cause they're the lowest TPE team. The team is pretty solidly meh, with two strong midfielders but everyone else is kind of just there. I don't think that'll be good enough to really compete, unfortunately, and they're headed for another season down in division 2.
Division 2
1. Liffeyside Celtic FC
Average TPE: 1592
Predicted Record: 9 - 1 - 2 (28 points)
I think last season was a case of whatever can go wrong, does, for Liffeyside. They'll return to form and finish on top of the division, even with some competition from teams like Black Forest and Reykjavik United. They're well known for their tactical success and outperforming their TPE (or so I've been told), and now they'll be the top dog in the division with 300+ TPE leads against 4 of 6 other teams. Their offense has struggled in recent seasons, but now against weaker competition they should be able to shine.
2. Reykjavik United
Average TPE: 1438
Predicted Record: 7 - 2 - 3 (23 points)
Reykjavik joins Liffeyside on the up-and-down rollercoaster (or at least making the playoff game). The Reykjavik offense should feast on the opposing defenses given how they did against division 1, but I'm not as high on the defense. To put it nicely, the defense struggled heavily and doesn't look a ton better. We'll see how they manage, but I think Reykjavik games will be high scoring affairs.
3. Xelaju Cosmico FC
Average TPE: 1194
Predicted Record: 6 - 4 - 2 (22 points)
They have a goalkeeper this time around! I think the defense will be the star of the show as they have a solid core, but one thing to keep an eye on is that Xelaju scored the third most goals last season in division 2. I think they have the right mix of playmakers to sustain that (especially since the top of the division is a little weaker this time around), and combined with a good defense they can make a real run at it!
4. Schwarzwalder FV
Average TPE: 1461
Predicted Record: 6 - 2 - 4 (20 points)
They didn't perform up to their TPE last season and I don't think it happens this time around, either. I could see them sneaking into third over Xelaju, but what's the point of a prediction article if you can't make a couple bold predictions? Like the 2nd highest team by TPE falling to fourth?
5. Tokyo S.C.
Average TPE: 1268
Predicted Record: 5 - 2 - 7 (17 points)
Tokyo managed to finish below an expansion team last season. With that said, I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt and predicting 17 points - 5 more than last season. They better not disappoint me again or else I'll never trust them ever.
6. I.R. Casablanca
Average TPE: 928
Predicted Record: 2 - 0 - 10 (6 points)
I don't think I have it in me to predict that an expansion team will finish above a non-expansion team. Casablance is at basically the same TPE level they were last season and I think that showing was the stars aligning moreso than their tactics/talent. I'd love to be wrong, but that's just how I see it! They'll be on the back foot for the next few seasons but hopefully soon I can predict them outside the bottom two.
7. ASC Yumboes de Dakar
Average TPE: 1000
Predicted Record: 1 - 1 - 10 (4 points)
Dakar had more TPE than Casablanca last season, too, and did significantly worse. They're just both at such a disadvantage I'm not sure it matters; the only team within 200 is Cosmico, and they're 400+ behind three teams. Any points earned in a match is a reason to celebrate for these teams.
