2022-07-31, 02:01 PM - Word count:
PARIS - In multiple early morning coverages of the S5 SSL draft for numerous French news networks, they announced the one thing many pundits were not expecting: with the 9th overall selection, Paris selected Tim Etodeliverapizzaball, a complete amateur in the grand scheme of things, along with his numerous eccentricities that would be deemed "undesirable."
The citizens of Paris were initially (morbidly) curious about Paris' 9th overall selection in the most recent SSL draft, but as more and more sightings have come to light, it seems that Paris simply isn't ready for Tim Etodeliverapizzaball. As the first games of the new season approach, more and more people have finally seen him in the flesh, and their reactions are clear: ...what?
"He's a very odd fellow, even compared to the Americans I've served" said a bakery owner that has witnessed Etodeliverapizzaball enter his shop. "His odor is quite bad, and his mannerisms are beyond unusual. Very friendly, but very disturbing all the same."
"I saw him walking once. He tried to motion me over, but all I saw was bad news."
For those who talked with him, it was an even stranger experience:
"He mistook me for someone named "Big Chick Charlie." I have a feeling he's an American friend, but I fear what company he keeps."
"He was friendly at first, but then he brought out the Scientology pamphlets. He began to explain his views on the matter, including the "no hell" policy, and how L. Ron Hubbard was the "true God." I was looking for a way out for around 25 minutes before I was able to escape while he was describing how some movie called Battlefield Earth would be as a Tyler Perry movie. I do not know who this actor is and I am not interested in these logistics."
The citizens of Paris were initially (morbidly) curious about Paris' 9th overall selection in the most recent SSL draft, but as more and more sightings have come to light, it seems that Paris simply isn't ready for Tim Etodeliverapizzaball. As the first games of the new season approach, more and more people have finally seen him in the flesh, and their reactions are clear: ...what?
"He's a very odd fellow, even compared to the Americans I've served" said a bakery owner that has witnessed Etodeliverapizzaball enter his shop. "His odor is quite bad, and his mannerisms are beyond unusual. Very friendly, but very disturbing all the same."
"I saw him walking once. He tried to motion me over, but all I saw was bad news."
For those who talked with him, it was an even stranger experience:
"He mistook me for someone named "Big Chick Charlie." I have a feeling he's an American friend, but I fear what company he keeps."
"He was friendly at first, but then he brought out the Scientology pamphlets. He began to explain his views on the matter, including the "no hell" policy, and how L. Ron Hubbard was the "true God." I was looking for a way out for around 25 minutes before I was able to escape while he was describing how some movie called Battlefield Earth would be as a Tyler Perry movie. I do not know who this actor is and I am not interested in these logistics."
<img src='https://i.imgur.com/b0drs9G.png' border='0' alt='user posted image' />
