2026-06-29, 08:51 AM - Word count:
As all of you know, there are twelve different organizations in the SSL and, as some of you may be aware of, there are also twelve months. It's a match made in heaven! Let's get assigning.
Some of these links are well thought out but by and large it's just the first thing I think of for a given month/organization. This was done completely out of order, as well, which I'm sure didn't do me any favors. With that said, onwards!
January
Organization: Club Atlètico Buenos Aires & Athênai F.C.
Reasoning: Based on what others have told me and what I could find on my own, Athens was the first official team in the SSL. What better org to match the first month of the year than the first team? It's a perfect pair!
February
Organization: Liffeyside Celtic Football Club & Club Sportif Rova Mpanjaka
Reasoning: After some deep digging (also known as using the search function on the forums), I found that Liffeyside / Rova were formally announced 3 days after the other season 22 expansion org teams. And with February being the shortest month it makes the most sense to make the shortest extant team the shortest month. There's only a couple easy pairings and this is one, so on we go!
March
Organization: Athletice Clava Romana & Inter London Football Club
Reasoning: March has one of the most important days of the year: March 10th. Mario day. That's right, Mario: the ITALIAN plumber. Which club plays in Italy? Athletice Clava Romana. So, in the spirit of Mario and therefore Nintendo as a whole, March is linked up with Rome. Also the Ides of March, if you're more into real life murder than into cartoon violence.
April
Organization: Shanghai Dragons Football Club & Rapid Magyar Sport Club
Reasoning: April fools! As in, you are the fool for losing so much. I took the extra step of calculating win percent instead of just raw win totals, and with that done the team with the lowest win percentage is the Shanghai Dragons. And, as we all know, losing makes you a fool. There were only 4 organizations left when I got to April so, you know, maybe somebody worse is out there and I just missed them cause they were already assigned. Oh well.
May
Organization: Xelajú Cósmico Fútbol Club & Académie de Football Masques Sacrés de Duékoué
Reasoning: Look, I'll level with you. May is the last month that needs an organization. Everything else has connections of varying strength, and of various levels of ease. I mean, January being the first team? That's a slam dunk. Nine Gems to September? Tougher one to think of. That brings us to Xelaju and Duekoue. I know nothing about these places. Their Wikipedia pages are sparse. Barren. Empty. They've only played 4 seasons so I can't even use that. Hold on I've stumbled upon Gold: The country of Guatemala is on land formerly controlled by the Mayan Empire, and to this day are influenced a lot by the Mayans, from language to religion and so on. And Maya contains the word May within it, making this a perfect match.
June
Organization: Hollywood Football Club & Football Club Kaapstad
Reasoning: When somebody near you says Hollywood, what do you think of? Movies. And when you think movies, you think one of two things: 1) A big summer blockbuster or 2) A big release just in time for the December Holiday season. For reasons that we'll go over next, the other summer months are taken, so Hollywood (and therefore Capetown) get assigned June.
July
Notes: July was created when the Roman senate decided to honor everyone's favorite emperor, Julius Caesar, a year after his death. And by created, I mean they renamed a month - from Quintilis (meaning five or fifth) to July. Before you ask: Yes, Quintilis (five) was the seventh month. That's because there was a calendar reform by Rome's second king (Numa Pompilius) to add two months to the calendar (January and February) which had, up until then, been more of an "unassigned" time period between the ten month calendar. So the fifth month became the seventh, sixth the eighth, and so on and so forth.
Organization: Reykjavik United & North Shore United
Reasoning: As some very helpful people told me, Sydney was originally an SSL team that relocated and rebranded to Reykjavik. And, apparently, a club in Laos relocated to North Shore. I'm sure you can see the connection here. Two in one!
August
Notes: Much like July was renamed in honor of Julius Caesar, Sextilis was renamed in honor of the first Roman emperor and adopted son of Caesar, Augustus.
Organization: Club de Futbol Catalunya & Seoul Mythic Football Club
Reasoning: From what I was told / could find, only 4 teams had ever relocated. Two were in one organization which just left two to fight for the right to get August. It's my wife's birth month and therefore a top 3 month so it's a big honor to get this one. A team early in the history relocated from Rio to Seoul.
September
Organization: Club Deportivo Tenochtitlan & Krung Thep Football Club
Reasoning: The Nine Gems (or Navaratna) are officially recognized state/royal symbols for the country of Thailand. That's good enough for me. NINE gems for the NINTH month. It's like poetry, it rhymes.
October
Organization: Schwarzwälder Fußballverein & Montreal United
Reasoning: The Black Forest is basically next door to Munich if you look at the country through an American lens of view. Which I am going to for the sake of this exercise, naturally. Munich is best known internationally not for its role as the capital of Bavaria or its importance in the post-war period, or for the rich history of culture and artists, but for beer. For Oktoberfest. And who am I to swim against the tides of popular international sentiment?
November
Organization: União São Paulo & Association Sportive de Paris
Reasoning: Combined, Sao Paulo and Paris have won a combined 11 championships and/or SSL Cups. I hate to do it again since I just did it with September, but we're getting really sparse on logical connections here. And, by the way, that feels like a lot of championships - good for you all!
December
Organization: Tokyo Sport Club & Cairo City Football Club
Reasoning: Christmas is in December. Christmas is all about giving gifts to those around you, and letting them know how special they are to you. In the context of football, what could be a better gift given than a goal? Therefore the most generous team must be the one with the most goals allowed, and the most generous team most embodies the Christmas spirit... give it up for Cairo! They've given a generous 973 gifts. There might be a team with more gifts given out there, but I do some months before others and you know how it goes.
Some of these links are well thought out but by and large it's just the first thing I think of for a given month/organization. This was done completely out of order, as well, which I'm sure didn't do me any favors. With that said, onwards!
January
Organization: Club Atlètico Buenos Aires & Athênai F.C.
Reasoning: Based on what others have told me and what I could find on my own, Athens was the first official team in the SSL. What better org to match the first month of the year than the first team? It's a perfect pair!
February
Organization: Liffeyside Celtic Football Club & Club Sportif Rova Mpanjaka
Reasoning: After some deep digging (also known as using the search function on the forums), I found that Liffeyside / Rova were formally announced 3 days after the other season 22 expansion org teams. And with February being the shortest month it makes the most sense to make the shortest extant team the shortest month. There's only a couple easy pairings and this is one, so on we go!
March
Organization: Athletice Clava Romana & Inter London Football Club
Reasoning: March has one of the most important days of the year: March 10th. Mario day. That's right, Mario: the ITALIAN plumber. Which club plays in Italy? Athletice Clava Romana. So, in the spirit of Mario and therefore Nintendo as a whole, March is linked up with Rome. Also the Ides of March, if you're more into real life murder than into cartoon violence.
April
Organization: Shanghai Dragons Football Club & Rapid Magyar Sport Club
Reasoning: April fools! As in, you are the fool for losing so much. I took the extra step of calculating win percent instead of just raw win totals, and with that done the team with the lowest win percentage is the Shanghai Dragons. And, as we all know, losing makes you a fool. There were only 4 organizations left when I got to April so, you know, maybe somebody worse is out there and I just missed them cause they were already assigned. Oh well.
May
Organization: Xelajú Cósmico Fútbol Club & Académie de Football Masques Sacrés de Duékoué
Reasoning: Look, I'll level with you. May is the last month that needs an organization. Everything else has connections of varying strength, and of various levels of ease. I mean, January being the first team? That's a slam dunk. Nine Gems to September? Tougher one to think of. That brings us to Xelaju and Duekoue. I know nothing about these places. Their Wikipedia pages are sparse. Barren. Empty. They've only played 4 seasons so I can't even use that. Hold on I've stumbled upon Gold: The country of Guatemala is on land formerly controlled by the Mayan Empire, and to this day are influenced a lot by the Mayans, from language to religion and so on. And Maya contains the word May within it, making this a perfect match.
June
Organization: Hollywood Football Club & Football Club Kaapstad
Reasoning: When somebody near you says Hollywood, what do you think of? Movies. And when you think movies, you think one of two things: 1) A big summer blockbuster or 2) A big release just in time for the December Holiday season. For reasons that we'll go over next, the other summer months are taken, so Hollywood (and therefore Capetown) get assigned June.
July
Notes: July was created when the Roman senate decided to honor everyone's favorite emperor, Julius Caesar, a year after his death. And by created, I mean they renamed a month - from Quintilis (meaning five or fifth) to July. Before you ask: Yes, Quintilis (five) was the seventh month. That's because there was a calendar reform by Rome's second king (Numa Pompilius) to add two months to the calendar (January and February) which had, up until then, been more of an "unassigned" time period between the ten month calendar. So the fifth month became the seventh, sixth the eighth, and so on and so forth.
Organization: Reykjavik United & North Shore United
Reasoning: As some very helpful people told me, Sydney was originally an SSL team that relocated and rebranded to Reykjavik. And, apparently, a club in Laos relocated to North Shore. I'm sure you can see the connection here. Two in one!
August
Notes: Much like July was renamed in honor of Julius Caesar, Sextilis was renamed in honor of the first Roman emperor and adopted son of Caesar, Augustus.
Organization: Club de Futbol Catalunya & Seoul Mythic Football Club
Reasoning: From what I was told / could find, only 4 teams had ever relocated. Two were in one organization which just left two to fight for the right to get August. It's my wife's birth month and therefore a top 3 month so it's a big honor to get this one. A team early in the history relocated from Rio to Seoul.
September
Organization: Club Deportivo Tenochtitlan & Krung Thep Football Club
Reasoning: The Nine Gems (or Navaratna) are officially recognized state/royal symbols for the country of Thailand. That's good enough for me. NINE gems for the NINTH month. It's like poetry, it rhymes.
October
Organization: Schwarzwälder Fußballverein & Montreal United
Reasoning: The Black Forest is basically next door to Munich if you look at the country through an American lens of view. Which I am going to for the sake of this exercise, naturally. Munich is best known internationally not for its role as the capital of Bavaria or its importance in the post-war period, or for the rich history of culture and artists, but for beer. For Oktoberfest. And who am I to swim against the tides of popular international sentiment?
November
Organization: União São Paulo & Association Sportive de Paris
Reasoning: Combined, Sao Paulo and Paris have won a combined 11 championships and/or SSL Cups. I hate to do it again since I just did it with September, but we're getting really sparse on logical connections here. And, by the way, that feels like a lot of championships - good for you all!
December
Organization: Tokyo Sport Club & Cairo City Football Club
Reasoning: Christmas is in December. Christmas is all about giving gifts to those around you, and letting them know how special they are to you. In the context of football, what could be a better gift given than a goal? Therefore the most generous team must be the one with the most goals allowed, and the most generous team most embodies the Christmas spirit... give it up for Cairo! They've given a generous 973 gifts. There might be a team with more gifts given out there, but I do some months before others and you know how it goes.
![[Image: LeBbUkk.gif]](https://i.imgur.com/LeBbUkk.gif)
