2026-10-29, 03:49 PM - Word count:
(This post was last modified: 2026-10-29, 04:12 PM by ceuk24. Edited 2 times in total.)
Thought I’d do my Academy Task 5 Deep Dive on the current roster of academy players, given I know next to nothing about the major/minor leagues, players, teams, etc. At least this exercise gives me an idea of what my guy is up against this season. I was going to focus primarily on green attributes and traits, as they are probably the biggest dividers at this early stage (when we don’t even have teams assigned!). So without further ado… here’s a wall of drivel.
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Piero Scozzafava (CM / CAM / LAM)
Traits: Dictates Tempo, Uses Outside Of Foot
Notable Attributes: First Touch (13), Passing (13)
Looking to be the midfield maestro of someone’s team, with a touch of Ricardo Quaresma magic from time to time (Just learned hitting the ball with the outside of your boot is called a trivela. Every day is a school day!). With Corners at 10, we’ll see how long it takes before hitting every one as a trivela does their knee in...
Kevin Hock (CDM / CM / CD)
Traits: Marks Opponent Tightly, Tries To Play Way Out Of Trouble
Notable Attributes: Passing (13), Tackling (13), Positioning (13), Teamwork (13), Vision (13)
Solid stats, although physicals aren’t much to write home about… yet. Could be a good pairing with Scozzafava in the middle.
Shooty McFace (CAM / RAM / CM)
Traits: Dictates Tempo, Tries Long Range Passes
Notable Attributes: Passing (13), Vision (13)
Left footed Scozzafava, minus the showboating, plus the ‘Hollywood’ passes.
Robertsinho (CD / RD / CDM)
Traits: Likes To Switch Ball To Other Flank, Tries Long Range Passes
Notable Attributes: Jumping (15)
The man, the legend. Surely everyone’s first pick, but I might be biased. Potentially known in the future either as “a big diddy who is reasonably good at stumbling into the way of a shot on target”, or “a big diddy who can hit the windscreen of any car in the stadium car park on request”.
Tom Syria (CD / CDM / CM)
Traits: Brings Ball Out Of Defense, Comes Deep To Get Ball
Notable Attributes: Acceleration (13), Jumping (13), Pace (13)
Physical beast, not someone you’d want to meet coming the other way in a dark alley, but definitely someone you’d want beside you at CB, until he wanders up the pitch and loses the ball…
Billiam Eldertrap (RD / RWB / RM)
Traits: Plays No Through Balls, Marks Opponent Tightly
Notable Attributes: None
Mr Wild Thornberry himself, actually got a good spread of attributes to become the third Neville brother.
Arnold Bereza (CDM / CM / CD)
Traits: Brings Ball Out Of Defense, Dictates Tempo, Marks Opponent Tightly
Notable Attributes: Strength (13), Concentration (13), Work Rate (14)
Another midfield terrier to go in a double pivot with Mr Hock, look at that Work Rate! And the first person to three traits (It's a bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for 'em).
E Tapas (CD / LD / CDM)
Traits: Dictates Tempo, Tries To Play Way Out Of Trouble
Notable Attributes: None
Solid attributes across the (CD) board. We certainly seem to be going for the cultured defenders that spray passes and dribble everywhere, rather than hulking legbreakers. Surely that won’t come back to bit us once we hit the big leagues, right?
Fabian Wintergreen (LD / RD / CDM)
Traits: Gets Forward Whenever Possible, Tries Long Range Passes
Notable Attributes: Acceleration (17), Pace (16)
S29’s very own Forrest Gump, this guy can go like s*** off a shovel, but also like Forrest Gump, that’s about it.
Elias Dogge (CM / CAM / ST)
Traits: Gets Into Opposition Area, Moves Into Channels, Shoots From Distance
Notable Attributes: Strength (17)
Going from the other attributes, possibly a CD who got tired of seeing his strikers missing and decided to have a go himself? Probably benches cars and eats iron lumps for breakfast, but will the Strength make up for 5s in Finishing and Long Shots?
Walid Touati (LD / CDM / CM)
Traits: Tries Long Range Passes, Winds Up Opponents
Notable attributes: None
S29’s resident s***talker and wind up merchant, can hit a pass and has a few tricks up his sleeve to back up the talk.
Maxi González (LD / RD / CDM)
Traits: Brings Ball Out Of Defense, Plays One-Twos
Notable attributes: None
Solid stats all round for his new position, given his injury woes pre-SSL. Looking forward to seeing which S29 defender ends up with the highest dribbling stat.
Nathan Neves (GK)
Traits: Winds Up Opponents
Notable attributes: Agility
A goalie, finally! More flexible than a Vegas stripper, this guy can dance between two poles at the same time! Also needs to be on a different team to Touati, so we can all enjoy the fireworks.
Matt Tomlinson (RD / RWB / LD)
Traits: Likes To Switch Ball To Other Flank, Looks For Pass Rather Than Attempting To Score
Notable attributes: None
Pretty even spread of attributes, probably the most over 9 of anyone so far. And so unselfish in front of goal, very commendable.
Hansel Fei (CAM / LAM / CM)
Traits: Plays One-Twos, Tries Killer Balls Often
Notable attributes: None
A man to unlock any defence with those traits. I’m going to tip this guy for most goal involvements.
Maximus Legend (CDM / CM / CD)
Traits: Stops Play, Dictates Tempo
Notable attributes: Decisions (16)
Not usually a fan of Stops Play, although possibly due to my default tactics being Gegenpress cheese. The next Busquets in the making?
Alyssa Aulbach (ST / CAM / RAM)
Traits: Gets Into Opposition Area, Moves Into Channels
Notable attributes: Composure (13), Decisions (13), Off the Ball (13), Teamwork (13), First Touch (13)
Tip for top scorer, on account of being the only out and out striker, she’s got it where it counts.
Joe Mograine (RAM / RM / CAM)
Traits: Places Shots, Tries First Time Shots
Notable attributes: Acceleration (13), Jumping (13), Pace (13)
S29s Adama Traore (or Didier Agathe for anyone who watched Celtic in the 2000s), THE pacy winger we all need in our lives. Like these players, no real technical ability to speak of.
Lefty Whippet (LWB / LD / RWB)
Traits: Brings Ball Out Of Defense, Gets Forward Whenever Possible
Notable attributes: None
A fellow Scot! Although questionable decision having Callum MacGregor as his render… Pacy wing back, and yet another defender bringing the ball out of defence.
Arthur Forrest (CM / CDM / CAM)
Traits: Dictates Tempo, Tries Killer Balls Often
Notable attributes: Determination (14)
Another central midfielder ready to spray the passes around the park.
George Cornea (GK)
Traits: None
Notable attributes: Reflexes (18!)
Our second goalie, reflexes like a cat, and winner of ‘highest individual stat in S29 class’ award.
Xabi Aloneso (CDM / CM / CAM)
Traits: Comes Deep to Get Ball, Dictates Tempo
Notable attributes: Passing (14), Vision (13)
Nicely rounded playmaker, but less emphasis on the defensive side than the others.
Chase Florence (LAM / LM / ST)
Traits: Tries First Time Shots, Gets Crowd Going
Notable attributes: Dribbling (13), Finishing (13), Long Shots (14)
The only person in the class worthy of being positioned at the edge of the box at corners (trivela or otherwise).
*********************************
So after all that waffle, what have a learned about my fellow class mates?
The guy you played 5-a-side with who just tried to dribble past everyone and wouldn’t pass? That’s about half of us. The other half like to hoof the ball really, really hard, and one day, if we get enough TPE, it might even end up at the feet of one of our teammates.
If we were a single team, our defenders would be rushing past our playmaking CDMs, losing the ball in the opponent’s half, to then have it won by said CDMs, who then spray passes out to the wings, ball comes in the box, and we overload with the few strikers and many CDs left stranded up near the 18 yard box. A doddle.
The big leagues will surely be quaking in their boots. If anyone finds this useful…. I’ll be surprised.
xxx
EDIT: As soon as I post this, two more players pop up! Have also added them, but I don't think their presence changes my 'conclusions'.
*********************************
Piero Scozzafava (CM / CAM / LAM)
Traits: Dictates Tempo, Uses Outside Of Foot
Notable Attributes: First Touch (13), Passing (13)
Looking to be the midfield maestro of someone’s team, with a touch of Ricardo Quaresma magic from time to time (Just learned hitting the ball with the outside of your boot is called a trivela. Every day is a school day!). With Corners at 10, we’ll see how long it takes before hitting every one as a trivela does their knee in...
Kevin Hock (CDM / CM / CD)
Traits: Marks Opponent Tightly, Tries To Play Way Out Of Trouble
Notable Attributes: Passing (13), Tackling (13), Positioning (13), Teamwork (13), Vision (13)
Solid stats, although physicals aren’t much to write home about… yet. Could be a good pairing with Scozzafava in the middle.
Shooty McFace (CAM / RAM / CM)
Traits: Dictates Tempo, Tries Long Range Passes
Notable Attributes: Passing (13), Vision (13)
Left footed Scozzafava, minus the showboating, plus the ‘Hollywood’ passes.
Robertsinho (CD / RD / CDM)
Traits: Likes To Switch Ball To Other Flank, Tries Long Range Passes
Notable Attributes: Jumping (15)
The man, the legend. Surely everyone’s first pick, but I might be biased. Potentially known in the future either as “a big diddy who is reasonably good at stumbling into the way of a shot on target”, or “a big diddy who can hit the windscreen of any car in the stadium car park on request”.
Tom Syria (CD / CDM / CM)
Traits: Brings Ball Out Of Defense, Comes Deep To Get Ball
Notable Attributes: Acceleration (13), Jumping (13), Pace (13)
Physical beast, not someone you’d want to meet coming the other way in a dark alley, but definitely someone you’d want beside you at CB, until he wanders up the pitch and loses the ball…
Billiam Eldertrap (RD / RWB / RM)
Traits: Plays No Through Balls, Marks Opponent Tightly
Notable Attributes: None
Mr Wild Thornberry himself, actually got a good spread of attributes to become the third Neville brother.
Arnold Bereza (CDM / CM / CD)
Traits: Brings Ball Out Of Defense, Dictates Tempo, Marks Opponent Tightly
Notable Attributes: Strength (13), Concentration (13), Work Rate (14)
Another midfield terrier to go in a double pivot with Mr Hock, look at that Work Rate! And the first person to three traits (It's a bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for 'em).
E Tapas (CD / LD / CDM)
Traits: Dictates Tempo, Tries To Play Way Out Of Trouble
Notable Attributes: None
Solid attributes across the (CD) board. We certainly seem to be going for the cultured defenders that spray passes and dribble everywhere, rather than hulking legbreakers. Surely that won’t come back to bit us once we hit the big leagues, right?
Fabian Wintergreen (LD / RD / CDM)
Traits: Gets Forward Whenever Possible, Tries Long Range Passes
Notable Attributes: Acceleration (17), Pace (16)
S29’s very own Forrest Gump, this guy can go like s*** off a shovel, but also like Forrest Gump, that’s about it.
Elias Dogge (CM / CAM / ST)
Traits: Gets Into Opposition Area, Moves Into Channels, Shoots From Distance
Notable Attributes: Strength (17)
Going from the other attributes, possibly a CD who got tired of seeing his strikers missing and decided to have a go himself? Probably benches cars and eats iron lumps for breakfast, but will the Strength make up for 5s in Finishing and Long Shots?
Walid Touati (LD / CDM / CM)
Traits: Tries Long Range Passes, Winds Up Opponents
Notable attributes: None
S29’s resident s***talker and wind up merchant, can hit a pass and has a few tricks up his sleeve to back up the talk.
Maxi González (LD / RD / CDM)
Traits: Brings Ball Out Of Defense, Plays One-Twos
Notable attributes: None
Solid stats all round for his new position, given his injury woes pre-SSL. Looking forward to seeing which S29 defender ends up with the highest dribbling stat.
Nathan Neves (GK)
Traits: Winds Up Opponents
Notable attributes: Agility
A goalie, finally! More flexible than a Vegas stripper, this guy can dance between two poles at the same time! Also needs to be on a different team to Touati, so we can all enjoy the fireworks.
Matt Tomlinson (RD / RWB / LD)
Traits: Likes To Switch Ball To Other Flank, Looks For Pass Rather Than Attempting To Score
Notable attributes: None
Pretty even spread of attributes, probably the most over 9 of anyone so far. And so unselfish in front of goal, very commendable.
Hansel Fei (CAM / LAM / CM)
Traits: Plays One-Twos, Tries Killer Balls Often
Notable attributes: None
A man to unlock any defence with those traits. I’m going to tip this guy for most goal involvements.
Maximus Legend (CDM / CM / CD)
Traits: Stops Play, Dictates Tempo
Notable attributes: Decisions (16)
Not usually a fan of Stops Play, although possibly due to my default tactics being Gegenpress cheese. The next Busquets in the making?
Alyssa Aulbach (ST / CAM / RAM)
Traits: Gets Into Opposition Area, Moves Into Channels
Notable attributes: Composure (13), Decisions (13), Off the Ball (13), Teamwork (13), First Touch (13)
Tip for top scorer, on account of being the only out and out striker, she’s got it where it counts.
Joe Mograine (RAM / RM / CAM)
Traits: Places Shots, Tries First Time Shots
Notable attributes: Acceleration (13), Jumping (13), Pace (13)
S29s Adama Traore (or Didier Agathe for anyone who watched Celtic in the 2000s), THE pacy winger we all need in our lives. Like these players, no real technical ability to speak of.
Lefty Whippet (LWB / LD / RWB)
Traits: Brings Ball Out Of Defense, Gets Forward Whenever Possible
Notable attributes: None
A fellow Scot! Although questionable decision having Callum MacGregor as his render… Pacy wing back, and yet another defender bringing the ball out of defence.
Arthur Forrest (CM / CDM / CAM)
Traits: Dictates Tempo, Tries Killer Balls Often
Notable attributes: Determination (14)
Another central midfielder ready to spray the passes around the park.
George Cornea (GK)
Traits: None
Notable attributes: Reflexes (18!)
Our second goalie, reflexes like a cat, and winner of ‘highest individual stat in S29 class’ award.
Xabi Aloneso (CDM / CM / CAM)
Traits: Comes Deep to Get Ball, Dictates Tempo
Notable attributes: Passing (14), Vision (13)
Nicely rounded playmaker, but less emphasis on the defensive side than the others.
Chase Florence (LAM / LM / ST)
Traits: Tries First Time Shots, Gets Crowd Going
Notable attributes: Dribbling (13), Finishing (13), Long Shots (14)
The only person in the class worthy of being positioned at the edge of the box at corners (trivela or otherwise).
*********************************
So after all that waffle, what have a learned about my fellow class mates?
The guy you played 5-a-side with who just tried to dribble past everyone and wouldn’t pass? That’s about half of us. The other half like to hoof the ball really, really hard, and one day, if we get enough TPE, it might even end up at the feet of one of our teammates.
If we were a single team, our defenders would be rushing past our playmaking CDMs, losing the ball in the opponent’s half, to then have it won by said CDMs, who then spray passes out to the wings, ball comes in the box, and we overload with the few strikers and many CDs left stranded up near the 18 yard box. A doddle.
The big leagues will surely be quaking in their boots. If anyone finds this useful…. I’ll be surprised.
xxx
EDIT: As soon as I post this, two more players pop up! Have also added them, but I don't think their presence changes my 'conclusions'.

