2025-05-22, 01:35 PM - Word count:
It comes as no surprise to me or anyone in the Simulation Soccer League ecosystem that I am the best player in the Academy league and most likely the Minor leagues as well. Similarly to Lamine Yamal, I was held as a child by a footballing icon, Adrian Mutu. He bestowed upon me the great powers that saw him unjustly banned in 2004 as a permanent affix to my game and since then it has enabled tremendous success. I joined Atletico Medellin later than most of the nobodies in the league and without a pre season I've put them all to shame so much so that I have heard reports that none of them will be drafted in the upcoming season. They are a bunch of unfit good for nothing tossers who rely on technique that is on the level of the local under 13's youth teams at the park. They are sprinted past with ease sometimes I can see their flab bursting underneath their shirts they are incredibly unfit. My agent Jamie Lynn Spears commented that they do not look good either unlike Matt Stro who is well revered among feminine sporting communities.
In my 7 games as of writing I have won 3 player of the match awards which is the most in the entire league and I have played 4 less games than those bumblers. This is a clear sign of my dominance over the peasants of the academies. Kim Wilde in 1986 released a song called You Keep Me Hanging On and that is what the other players are thinking when they watch me, they are so inspired by me that I keep them hanging on to their dreams of being a pro in the SSL. Two goons are above me in the average rating category, both of whom have only played four games. Mcpaunaman makes sense as he's been a tap in merchant which they love, he's been privileged enough to be on my side and carried by me. The other fool is Lewis Fontaine DC or something looks like a luck rider who'll probably fall off soon. I have ordered the Medellin defenders to slide tackle him and I will be granting whoever follows through with this a night out at the Ritz on my tab that I have there. I regularly dine at the Ritz taking a plane from Medellin after games as I do not care about the environment and dine with many important world figures that other academy players would be ignored by.
I am extremely generous and have created the most chances in the league whilst playing fewer games as opponents are just that easy. This displays my teamwork and commitment to the cause which some journalists who follow me around question. Ever since I came to Medellin journalistic output has increased fourfold due to my mere presence and ticket sales have gone through the roof. It is no wonder that all the teams are lining up to pick me first in the draft.
In my 7 games as of writing I have won 3 player of the match awards which is the most in the entire league and I have played 4 less games than those bumblers. This is a clear sign of my dominance over the peasants of the academies. Kim Wilde in 1986 released a song called You Keep Me Hanging On and that is what the other players are thinking when they watch me, they are so inspired by me that I keep them hanging on to their dreams of being a pro in the SSL. Two goons are above me in the average rating category, both of whom have only played four games. Mcpaunaman makes sense as he's been a tap in merchant which they love, he's been privileged enough to be on my side and carried by me. The other fool is Lewis Fontaine DC or something looks like a luck rider who'll probably fall off soon. I have ordered the Medellin defenders to slide tackle him and I will be granting whoever follows through with this a night out at the Ritz on my tab that I have there. I regularly dine at the Ritz taking a plane from Medellin after games as I do not care about the environment and dine with many important world figures that other academy players would be ignored by.
I am extremely generous and have created the most chances in the league whilst playing fewer games as opponents are just that easy. This displays my teamwork and commitment to the cause which some journalists who follow me around question. Ever since I came to Medellin journalistic output has increased fourfold due to my mere presence and ticket sales have gone through the roof. It is no wonder that all the teams are lining up to pick me first in the draft.
